Episode 111: Gender Equality in Parenting and Domestic Labor

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Ilia Danner Grubbs, Victoria Reynolds Farmer, and Katie Norman Grubbs discuss Darcy Lockman’s book All the Rage, and issues of gender equality in parenting and domestic labor.  




Introduction and personal background



  • Term Definitions: 


Individualism vs. Essentialism 

Slackers vs. Helpers vs. Sharers 


  • Information about Disparities in Household Labor and How it Affects us 


Discussion of three of the studies referenced in the book


  • Steps Toward Change


Self Evaluation Questions:

  • Who in your relationship has the leeway to forget something in parenthood or in household responsibilities?  
  • Have you and your partner ever explicitly discussed expectations for division of household labor?  How has the division borne out in reality? Has it changed after children/job changes/or just over time?
  • Who bears the responsibility for kinkeeping?  (Relational maintenance outside the home)
  • How much of your household work is “hidden” vs. how much is recognized and appreciated/applauded?  
  • How much of your household responsibilities are scafolded by the work of your partner?  
  • How much of your involvement in household work is discretionary?  How much is expected?
  • What happens if you choose not to do a task? Does your partner do it or does it remain undone until you go back to it?
  • Do you notice when a task needs to be done, or are you “happy to help” if it is pointed out to you?


Ilia: Article about All the Rage on NPR

Men Do See the Mess article by The Conversation

All the Rage by Darcy Lockman


Victoria: A Strange Stirring: The Feminine Mystique and American Women at the Dawn of the 1960s by Stephanie Coontz


Katie: Unfinished Business by Anne-Marie Slaughter

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